The Art Of Sandbagging

 “It’s just up there…”

“Ehh… the moves aren’t too hard.”

“Trust me, it’ll be fine.”

The tools of a sandbagger. Trust me… 5.8+… It’s not too bad… When you hear these phrases you should run. 

But, if you utilize them you may be able to brainwash your poor partner into an epic adventure. 

I’ve fallen prey to sandbagging many a time. Be it trying a 5.8 offwidth or hiking half a mile uphill past rock that was so underwhelming I didn’t think it was the crag I was told about.

Grades are the most common form of sandbagging. Often times it is impossible to discern whether one is bound for an ego crushing until they are on the route. But one exception is the infamous single digit followed by a + (ie. 5.9+). These grades remind me of conspiracy theories on the false innocence of birds… seemingly harmless, but actually evil government drones.

Sandbagging can be dangerous too! Climbing isn’t the only sport cursed with under exaggeration. Once, while mountain biking, a friend and I hit a drop. It scared me, but if I could do it why couldn’t my brother?

“Yeah dude, go for it! You’ll be fine!”

Let’s just say that situation ended with concussion delirium, him asking the same question several times, and a fail video that had 180,000 views.

The only upsides are enjoyed by the sandbagger themselves. Sandbagging is just the inflation of one’s ego in hopes of smashing that of a poor gumby. It’s giving them false hope for “a sick route”. It’s getting a partner to belay them on a…

Wait… a belay? Sounds nice…

How else am I supposed to get people out to the cliff to belay me for an hour on project? How else am I supposed to get that same poor brother to bushwhack uphill in search of an elusive waterfall…

I guess I could appeal to them with honesty… 

Or I could keep telling them “We’re close!” till we find the waterfall.